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The Men

Here is the final scouting report for 2011.

*The number in parentheses next to the team name is the predicted order of finish by our amazing scouting department.

1. (10) The Rack Valley

Tyler Hooks, Dan Hippensteel, and Chris Fraim (1st)

This trio of newcomers surprised the veterans and ran away with the 2011 Curves title. They won most of their games going away and their only loss was in game one of the championship against The F'in Catalina Wine Wifflers. Their succes was based on the crafty skills of Fraim and Hippensteel while Hooks relied on his youth. Will they be able to defend their title in 2012?

2. (4) The F'In Catalina Wine Wifflers

Dan Sanborn (5th) and Jake Sanborn (4th)

An impressive effort by the Sanborns gave them the best finish on their resume. They were seen hitting long balls throughout their comeback through the losers' bracket. Their only two losses of the day were to the champions. In their last two tourney's they've finished third and second. Will 2012 be a title?

3. (1) Wuck Feaver

Chris Grzegorczyk (8th) and Pete Lamerato (5th)

G and Lamerato now know how hard it is to repeat as champs. Things started off great with four straight wins including two one-run victories. Then they ran into Rack Valley and dropped a 4-12 decision. Despite the loss, the duo recorded their third top three finish. Rumors are beginning about a young former Hawk joining in 2012.


4. (19) Wiffle Deez Ballz

Jason Kanarky (3rd) and Chris Quackenbush (2nd)

Deez had a very impressive showing in their second year. They went from 19th place in 2010 to 4th this year. Their bats were seen and heard all day long. They put up 31 runs in their first two games, and then somehow were shutout by Wuck Feaver in a 0-1 loss. They scored 46 more runs over their last four games, including 15 in their final loss of the day.



5. (7) Swinging Cocks (Roosters that is)

Kevin Timmins and Michael Pizzuti (5th)

The Cocks put forth their second consecutive and third overall top ten finish. This year's fifth place finish is the best showing on their WB resume. They won their first three games before dropping a tough 4-5 game to Wuck Feaver. The Cocks are always looking for action, WB that it is, and our scouts are wondering if they can keep this momentum going for another tourney.


6. (8) The Hackaholics

Joel Wollborg and Jeff Willman (3rd)

Another strong showing for the JW duo. In three tourneys they have a 9th place and two sixth place finishes. They started the day with three straight wins before dropping the next two to Rack Valley and Wiifle Deez Balls, who both finished in the top five. Also, props to these two for their creative team uniforms.

7. (11) The Amazing Wiffle Ball-A-Wacker Guys

Kyle Goodwin and Mike Worley (1st)

Not a bad job by our scouting department for projecting these first timers as an 11th place team. They surpassed expectations and defeated fellow Clio teammates We've Got the Runs. Their only two losses were against top five teams, so look out for these guys in 2012.


8. (18) Pinch Runners

Brian Perry (5th) and John David Kuhar (3rd)

The momentum they built by winning the Toilet Bowl tourney two years ago carried over and the Runners put together their first top ten finish. After dropping a close one against the Hackaholics they picked up three straight wins in the losers' bracket, including a 6-5 W over Stack Attack. Look for the Runners to try and build on the new momentmum next year.

9. (2) We've Got The Runs

Craig LeDuc (7th) and Mark Hooks (8th)

The tourney started normal for Hooker and LeDuc with two straight wins, including a 6-4 victory over arch nemesis Curve Your Enthusiasm. And then they ran into the Hackaholics and dropped a 6-7 decision. Typically they would respond with a string of wins, but they ran into the buzz saw known as the The Amazing Wiffle Ball-A-Wacker Guys. Thumbs up on another top ten performance, but can they claim the hardware they want at Curves IX?

10. (17) You're Killing Me Smalls

Morrison Borders (4th) and Joel Weir (5th)

A nice pefromance by Borders and Weir this year to claim the ten spot, which is their first visit to the Top 10. They put together three solid wins and both of their losses were respectable. Could this be a sign that aging is actually helping this team and their WB skills? Our scouts think so and will be expecting an even better performance in 2012.

11. (23) My Name is Brian Toth and Michigan State Makes Me Sick

Adam Jerry (1st) Evan Winters (4th)

These guys played solid WB and most importantly brought home hardware for Best Team Name. We are pretty sure the Awards Committee was really impressed with only four words in their team name. Regardless a top eleven showing was impressive and perhaps Winters has found a teammate to stick with for future tourneys.


12. (9) Stack Attack

Kevin Stackpoole and Brian Stackpoole (8th)

First question: Where is the Curves shower that K-Dog just got out of before taking this picture?
Second question: Are the Stack's still capable of competing for a Curves Title? They have four top five finishes, but the last three years have been seventh, tenth, and now twelfth place finishes. At least there is always a hot tub in Clio waiting for B-Stack and a back porch foot massage waiting for Kevino.


13. (3) Thunder Wingnut

Andy Wingert and Eric White (3rd)

These guys officially have our scouts confused. In three years they've finished near the bottom, near the top, and now in the middle of the pack. So where do they belong? To their credit they did get a tough draw this year and their two losses were closely contested games against Top Ten teams. Next year will give our scouts the answer.


14. (15) Chin Music

Mike Fransten (1st) Matt Vargo (3rd)

Vargo looked to Fransten to replace his teammate of two years and it looked great in the beginning with an upset victory over the 5th seeded Wonder Bro's. But then they lost their next two games and exited the tourney. We are not sure what Vargo will do next year, but we know he'll be hoping to return to 2009 form when he finished in the Top 10.


15. (16) Power Pounders

Marc Szalka, Ryan Baker, and Jim Anderson (1st)

A decent showing for these first time WBers. Most importantly they blew out the Titans for Ta Ta's in the battle of FPS employees. They picked up another W against the Wonder Bro's before bowing out of the tourney. Now that Szalka is at the right school, perhaps this new found "We Are D------" motto will spark the rest of his teammates to Power Up and get the job done in 2012.




16. (27) Spike Don't Play with Girls

Michael Flaherty (7th), Michael Belisle (1st), and Tedi Belisle (1st)

Our scouts have some advice for Spike: Start playing with girls. Flaherty dropped his old teammate and added the Belisle duo which led to two victories and a tough 3-4 loss to the Pinch Runners. The big question is what will happen to this team in 2012: Will they stay as a group of three or will Flaherty rejoin with Lafferty.



17. (5) Wonder Bro's

Dustin Looper (3rd) and Jeff Gaisor (5th)

We'd like to put these guys down as the most disappointing team, but see team number twenty-five. Where did it go wrong for the Wonder Bro's? Perhaps they had too much fun Friday because after dropping their first two games they did rally to win the Toilet Bowl Championship. Going home with hardware is always better that going home empty handed. Props to the Bro's for once again camping out and haning to the wee hours with the Curves Crew.


18. (25) Double Secret Probation

Chris Lake (7th) and Jeremy Fox (6th)

The day started rough with two straight losses, but then the men of DSP rallied for two straight wins in the Toilet Bowl. They dropped the championship game to the Wonder Bro's, but the two wins showed they still have something left in the tank. Unfortunately they did not get any wins in the home run derby and 50/50.

19. (14) Belsay Road Bandits

David Ayers (3rd) and Walter White (4th)

The Bandits dropped their first game, then rallied for and 8-7 victory, but then dropped their next game making a quick end to their 2011 campaign. We were hoping that they would get a showdown with Shiva Blast, but no such luck. We did however decide to rank them one above SB to give them a little trash talk heading in to 2012.

20. (13) Shiva Blast

Russ White (3rd) and Craig Elliot (1st)

These guys faced the same fate as Russ' father's team above, but unfortunately our scouts ranked them one spot lower. Why? Both teams lost to Pinch Runners, but the men of Shiva Blast only scored one run. So, looking to 2012 the family rivalry should be fun and hopefully the draw leads to a first round showdown. Or will Russ and Duke reunite?

21. (20) Wiffle House

Mike Rudy and Chris Bisha (2nd)

A tough first round draw led to a loss, but they responded with a 15-0 whooping of Master Mason. The victory led to a showdown with their friends from Killing Me Smalls, which ended in a 1-2 loss. At least they didn't wear skirts to the tourney.

22. (28) Here for the Beer

Tom Downs and Kristof Kurzeja (2nd)

A year of experience proved to be a big difference for these guys. They picked up their first Curves W by defeating Master Mason. They dropped their next two games, but the scores were more competitive than in 2010. But they were here for other reasons than WB, which is always a good thing.

23. (22) Inge and Rayburn

Chris Johnston and Mark Johnston (7th)

It was an odd year for the J Brothers. No bug girl, no weekend washers, and they won a game. And the team they beat finished in 8th place last year. Crazy stuff. Hopefully things return to normal in 2012, well at least the other stuff besides WB. Congrats to Mark on his recent wedding.

24. (29) Double D's

David Lee Toth (7th) and Dan Breathour (2nd)

The Double D's lost their first two games but then rallied for an impressive victory in the Toilet Bowl. Could this lead to a successful 2012 tourney? There are rumors circulating that these two are considering adding a third player to the squad. We cannot confirm that it is former UofM running back Jamie Morris, but there are pictures that lead us to believe this might be the case.



25. (6) Curve Your Enthusiasm

Josh Swartz and Ben Taylor (4th)

Somehow our scouts had this team finishing in 6th place. Not sure what happened, but to be fair these guys did have a tough draw. They lost their first round game 4 to 6 to We've Got the Runs and then dropped the next game to Thunder Wingnut. Both of those teams have top five finishes. To make matters worse, their Toilet Bowl game was against another top five team in the Wonder Bro's. Perhaps the lottery will be kinder in 2012.

26. (12) Titans for Ta-Tas

Dave Vermullen (5th) and Ken Sanders (4th)

These guy are like a bobble head, constantly moving up and down. One tourney they are a solid team, and the next year they are near the bottom of the pack. That would be the case this year, losing all three games, including a showdown against the Power Pounders. So, next year, if Sanders can buck up and share some cottage responsibilites, look for this team to be near the top ten.

27. (22) Gator Needs Some Walkin' Around Money

Andrew McNish and Ryan McNish (2nd)

The Cousins McNish had a rough run in 2011. They dropped all three games but showed flashes throughout the day. Perhaps Ryan will be getting more luck in the 2012 tourney since he is now hanging closer with Brian Kelly and the Golden Domers.

28. (26) Master Mason

Jim Gatza (1st) and Scott Hapworth (2nd)

A couple of thoughts:
1. Nice picture
2. Congrats to Hapworth to be the first Curves participant to wear a collared shirt.
Anyway, the Mason duo struggled with their WB skills, but made up for it with solid pizza and hanging out late into the night.


29. (21) Military Might

Kevin Paladino and Alan Stackpoole (1st)

The men of Might had a tough debut at Curves dropping all three games. To make matters worse our photography department somehow forgot to take their picture. Good luck to Stackpoole as he heads off the United States Army.

The Lovely Ladies

Great work this year ladies!

1. (4) Boobs for Boobs

Heather Brennan (4th) and Danielle Soria (1st)

Brennan recruited Soria to replace her longtime partner Amber and it worked out. The Boobs won all of their games and claimed the 2011 Ladies Championship. Their closest game was in the first round when they squeaked out a 9-8 victory over Gryffindor. Perhaps that game warmed Soria up to WB and they dominated the rest of the day.This is Brennan's second title in three years.

2. (1) Hooker and Porn

Angela Porn (1st) and Karlee Hooks (2nd)

Great team name and great WB all day, however they came up a little bit short. The duo dropped their second game but rallied to win the losers' bracket before losing to Boobs for Boobs in the title game. Young Karleeto has an impressive resume now with a first and second place showing, but who will her teammate be in 2012?

3. (2) High Five

Jen LeDuc and Shauna Dillard (5th)

The ladies of High Five continue to impress the Curves Crew with their style, this year donning parts of Curves T-shirts from every tournament. Their WB was solid again winning their first two games, but then they ran into the 1st and 2nd place teams. As always, we will look forward to their 2012 uniform/name ideas.

4. (6) Babes in Toyland

Melissa McGovern and Marla VanWormer (1st)

The two Muth graduates of 1993 had the best showing of any new team. This is not a suprise, considering some of the amazing people they had the privelege of going to school with. Anyway, the Babes won their first game by one run, lost their second game by one run, and then lost by four to Hooker and Porn. Our scouts think this might be the start of something good.

5. (5) Besties for Breasties

Courtney Knox and Jody Sutton-Jones (1st)

The Besties put forth an impressive showing for a first tourney team. They lost a tough 0-1 game against Babes in Toyland. They won two straight games before losing a tough game to Hooker and Porn. Now that they have a year of experience under their belt, look for a better finish in 2012.

6. (3) Save A Rack

Meredith Schloegel (1st) Lisa Berthold (6th), and Jennfier Bjorkman (4th)

The day started out great for the ladies of Save A Rack. First they were on time, which is no small feat. Then they earned a one run victory over the second place team. But then the "Wheels" fell off and they dropped their next two games. Look for an off season filled with WW, CL, and WB by the lake.


7. (8) Gryffindor

Debbie Washington and Donna Schaffer (1st)

What could have been for these two Hungarian wizards? It was their first game in Curves history, and the excitement was buzzing. They played great and had a chance to win, but they eventually lost to the first place team 8-9. And then the day went down hill. They lost their next game, but did rally to win the one game Toilet Bowl Championship. They also claimed trophies for best team uniform!

8. (9) Hakuna Ma Ta Ta's

Paula Dietz and Megan Flaherty (1st)

The Ta Ta's played with great passion and entertained the crowd throughout the day. They dropped their first game but picked up a win against Fight Like A Girl before bowing out of the tourney. The girls in yellow also claimed the award for Best Team Name.

9. (7) Fight Like a Girl

Sarah Johnston (2nd) and Michelle Gatza (1st)

These two ladies were seen having a great time and enjoying the day which is really what Curves is all about. Then again we are pretty sure they were seen having a great time and enjoying the evening as well! So great job ladies and we hope you do the same in 2012. If we had an award for best team spirit, these two would own it.

The Seniors


1. (1st) Morrison Hotel

Keith Hooks, Scot Sutton, and Mark Hooks (3rd)

Three tournaments and three titles for the men of Morrison Hotel. Once again the gents from Clio were unstoppable. Their first game against the East Coast Terrors was their only close game and they still won 5-1. We feel confident in saying that if they comeback in 2012 they will be the first Curves team to win four titles.

2. (2) East Coast Terrors

John Cook (1st) and Jim Toth (3rd)

The ECT's are good enough to win the title in any year Morrison Hotel doesn't play. They won every game against a team not named Morrison Hotel. We should point out that these are two highly motivated individuals who don't like losing, so we have a feeling this might be an off season dedicated to WB.


3. (3) Rack Attack

Pete Vanderhaar and John Lewis (4th)

Rack Attack is putting together a nice Curves resume. They won the original senior tourney and now also have a second, third, and fourth place finish, which of course means they will finish fifth in 2012. These guys always seem to play in close games, and this year was no different with two games being decided by one run.

4. (5) Zing Zang

Al Weiss (2nd) and Joe Toth (5th)

The Legend switched partners and picked up Smooth Al and the duo started the day with a victory. Then they ran into Morrison Hotel, but they recovered nicely with a 6-0 victory over the Olde English D's. Their last game was a tough 0-1 loss to fellow Horizon Tan teammates Rack Attack. Will these two be a duo again in 2012?

5. (4) Stack-a-licious

Rick Stackpoole (2nd), Joe Stackpoole (2nd), Bill Stackpoole (3rd)

The other version of the Stack Brothers lost a high scoring affair to Zing Zang 9-14. They responded by whooping on the Stud Muffins, but they were soon bounced out of the tourney by Rack Attack. Our scouts are pretty sure that these brothers will be back and ready to go in 2012. Congrats to Washington state resident Uncle Joe for once again claiming the title of farthest to travel to play at Curves.


6. (7) The Olde English D's

Tim Daoust and Dave Johnston (4th)

It looked like it was going to be a bad day for the D's as they dropped their first two games. But then, like any well coached Valpo team, they rallied and won their next two games to claim the 2012 Senior Toilet Bowl Championship. The sixth place finish is their best in three years and could lead to a great tourney next year.

7. (8) The Stud Muffins

Marc Watkins (3rd), Tom Keller (3rd) and Dennis Arvanitis (1st)

The Muffins added Arvanitis and the acquisition quickly paid off. These guys were seen hitting dingers and making plays during their first game against the heavily favored men of Rack Attack. It was a great game with a questionable ending, but the Muffins fell 7-8. If they keep Arvanitis under contract look for an improved placing in 2012.

8. (6) The Ball Wackers

Mike Mueller and Floyd Haubenstricker (2nd)

The Wackers were in for a tough day the minute the drawing took place. Their first round opponent: Morrison Hotel. They did improve as the day wore on, but they struggled to score runs and lost in the toilet bowl 0-1 against the Stud Muffins.


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